Evolution

There’s a topic I’ve wanted to write about since I started this masters blog, but have been waiting for the right time. And I’ve also been pondering whether to even talk about it. Well, it’s time to stop overthinking and just put it out there. Let’s dive right in.

My birthday is coming up in a week, October 7 to be exact. I will be 46 years old. 46. Damn girl, not too shabby.

I have never been one to get caught up in the numbers during my birthdays. I’ve owned them all. I was SO happy to turn 30 and didn’t have a problem with turning 40 whatsoever. I still feel like I’m in my 30s in many ways TBH. And I will always have the mind of a 13-year-old, but I digress. This past year has been a bit different. It’s been more of a friendly little reminder of how old I really am. Something which couldn’t be more clear to me because of…well…because menopause.

Ugh, the M-word. Something I NEVER even gave a single thought to. It wasn’t even an afterthought! That shit is WAY out there isn’t it?? Like 20 years away, right?? Nope! It’s lurking, circling around you sister. Let’s be clear, I’m not officially in the M game yet. I’m what they call perimenopausal. Didn’t even know it was a thing until I was diagnosed two years ago after a couple of funky fresh things were happening with my body I never experienced before. This past year, though, things kicked up a notch. Hot flashes. Serious fatigue. Forgetfulness. Poor concentration. Just an overall feeling of ‘I think I am going crazy.’

What does this have to do with CrossFit you say? Everything. Just as I noted in my last post about nutritional considerations for masters athletes, some of us may also be dealing with hormonal changes, both men and women. And it can wreak havoc not just physically but also psychologically. If you’re going through it now, I’m here to tell you, you’re not alone. There have been some days where I didn’t work out because I was exhausted. We’re talking about a level of exhaustion I’ve never felt before, even when I was pregnant. There have also been days where a hot flash came in the middle of a WOD and I felt like I was suffocating. So I headed over to the Costco fan, took a couple of deep breaths, got my mind right, and then went back into it. It’s not every day, but I know it’s now my new reality.

As I am attempting to get used to this shift, I’m learning to adjust my thinking, just as we do with CrossFit. If a movement starts to get in our head, we might find ourselves getting stuck, or overthinking, and not progressing. But we learn to shift our mindset into something more positive, more productive. I’m grateful to be able to utilize that resilience skill.

So I’m working to own this next chapter. This is my evolution, my unfolding into the next version of me. And damned if I’m not going to let some stupid hot flash get in my way.