Can I Have 5 Minutes of Your Mind?
Episode 7: Learning How to Give Credit to Yourself
By: Yenifer De Lara
Credit is praise, compliments, gratitude, value, grace, acceptance. Notice I did not title this episode ‘Learning How to Take Credit for Yourself.’ If that were the title, I would be talking about how to take the credit someone gives you. But what about the credit you give yourself, or the lack of credit you give yourself ? Back to the basics: you cannot properly receive a compliment from someone if you cannot first give yourself one. It is time you learn to credit yourself for what you do. If you seek external validation, if you seek external praise, when will you seek (and appreciate) the value you already have inside? Why not indulge in positive thoughts that only you can give to yourself ?
At all times, you can give yourself a statement of praise. At all times, you can give yourself a personal compliment. At any point in your day, you can give yourself a moment to feel gratitude! You can think about or write down things you are grateful for; this will allow for you to give credit for all that is going well in your life. If you can’t give yourself credit for being in great health, how could it possibly matter how much you squat or bench press? Next time someone says “Good job on your squat,” please don’t resort to nitpicking at the things that could’ve been executed better. Not only does the compliment dissolve, you also end up not fully acknowledging the person. The inability to fully accept the compliment blocks you off from potentially connecting with the person and their good energy they were giving you. Telling yourself sentences that speak of your inherent value are paths that allow for you to explore self-love. You have all the capacity to recount everything you’re good at, the God given talent, the skills you’ve perfected, the skills you’re working at, the things you’ve overcome, the things you’re currently building, the enriching activities you love and come back to frequently, etc. You have intrinsic value. Intrinsic meaning “belonging naturally; essential.”
It starts with intention. With having intentional inner conversations (or journaling sessions) that make you acknowledge your self-worth. It starts with amplifying your inner voice. It starts with uplifting messages you tell yourself, or write down. It means believing these messages. It means developing acceptance. In this case, acceptance is having welcoming energy (for the credit you are intending to give to yourself). It does start with potentially having to question why you can’t take a compliment, or why you can’t seem to intuitively name one great quality you currently possess. *Hint: it may come from your childhood.
Whether you are learning to give credit to yourself, or have gotten good at seeing how awesome you are, please remember that repetition builds strength, so it is only a matter of (intentional) practice… over and over. Don’t forget you can always restart, and reset as many times as you need to. It takes time to unlearn habits that may have made you think you don’t have things to credit yourself for. It takes time to unlearn comments made by people who may have tried to devalue you. Learning how to give and believe the praise you give to yourself crosses over into all aspects of who a person is. You may find and feel more confidence. You should believe self-respect is non-negotiable; it may help you build better boundaries in all relationships. You should trust your current abilities and seek your potential… Congratulations on reading this article! If you have a question, or comment, and want to talk about it, please feel free to do so.