Can I have 5 Minutes of Your Mind?

Episode 4: Responding Instead of Reacting
By: Yenifer De Lara
One commonly understood definition of ‘reacting’ is to “snap back at someone.” Key word is ‘snap.’ Picture a twig snapping in pieces. That piece of wood was too rigid. That piece of wood couldn’t handle any bend at all. Another definition of ‘reacting’ is found in the situation where two chemicals combine and transform into a different substance. There was chemical instability. The two chemicals weren’t compatible. The chemicals were highly reactive in relationship with each other.

Reactions take various forms such as anger, avoidance, defensiveness, withdrawal, people-pleasing, blame, recklessness, seeking immediate gratification, physical aggression, dismissive behavior etc. Reactions get their energy source from unresolved emotions and thoughts- this is where developing mindfulness can help generate “mental organization.” Here’s a list of things you can do to aid in figuring out how & why you responded to something the way you did.

A) Lay down, close your eyes, do NOTHING for 10 minutes, just breathe. Let the thoughts come and go. That is exactly your place. Build stillness, peace, and clarity. (Otherwise known as meditation.)

B) Write down some old memory that still bugs you. Write why it bothers you, write how it makes you feel, write why you can’t get over it. Writing it down means less of it is in you. Work through it, write about the discomfort. Unravel the story. Unclog your heart space. (Otherwise known as journaling.)

C) Move your body—go for a walk, stretch, dance, do some deep breathing while standing. Let the tension shake out of your muscles. Physical movement helps process emotions and brings you back to the present. (Otherwise known as somatic release.)

D) Name what you’re feeling out loud. Say, “I feel angry,” or “I feel overwhelmed,” and let yourself sit with it for a moment. Acknowledge your emotions without judgment. Naming them reduces their power over you. (Otherwise known as emotional awareness.)

E) Connect with nature—step outside, touch a tree, feel the sun on your face, or listen to the wind. Nature has a way of grounding and regulating your nervous system. (Otherwise known as grounding.)